wine

my eyes open slowly

i always awake the same

increasing awareness at a snails pace

the continuous rise and fall of my chest

my lungs filling with new air

while expelling in to the world the old

that same air that fills me

seems heavy today

and moving my fragile bones

from the comfort of this bed

strains my body in a way I cannot

fathom, into words

how i imagine swimming in molasses to feel

so many people find solace in me

filling my heart with their own darkness, their weight

confessions and secrets

they wrap them in bows and ribbon

disguise them draped in words

that make me feel small sense of pride

i trust you

you listen

you understand

i stir underneath the covers

my friend arrives ” your not out of bed yet”

“the world rests on my chest, its a heavy burden to bare my friend”

“well my love rid yourself of everything heavy”

they will always insist

you get rid of the weight

but never explain how to put it down

I only move from my blankets to pour myself a glass of wine

i had to stop drinking whiskey

it turned my tongue sharp

and my heart bitter

pinot makes me feel like air

clouds

up up and away

the air is nice here

i think ill stay awhile

<JG><UNDRESSED>

 

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